Sugar Gliders Are Not Awesome

They lull you with their cuteness
 


This Albino is a master of the craft.

Then they fly at you
 


Seriously, they fly at you!!!

What if this was your face
 


Off of doors
 


Out of closets
 


They do this unexpectedly
 


And sit on your head
 


They listen to Radiohead
 


Which means they are either pretentious or have better taste than you, bad news either way.

They bite

 

But they bite goths, too
 


They Make this Noise
 


That noise says “I hate you” in every available frequency.

They Crawl All over your Body

 

And your Siblings won't save you either.

And there is a litnany of other reasons to not own a sugar glider
 


These are legitimate reasons not like those other ones.